My blood, sweat and tears

2011-11-06T23:56:00.002+08:00

I dont need a girl to be pretty, rich, sexy..
As long as she doesn't give me headache,
I'm more than willing to give her
All the love she desire

the end?

2011-05-18T02:53:00.002+08:00

how do i know it's the end of the road?

the lack of trust? the lost of faith?
or the absence of love?

or it's the end only when i'm being dumped?
only when my partner has no love for me?
sounds kinda irresponsible to me..

what does that make me?

so i can be hurt?
so i can be taken advantage of?

is this the end?

have i reach another cross road of my life?

how come i kept hearing it's all my fault that i caused that incident?

what is it exactly that is desired or wanted?

i think perhaps only time will tell..
i believe the time is running out..

王力宏 - 你不知道的事

2011-05-18T02:48:00.002+08:00

王力宏 - 你不知道的事

蝴蝶擦几次眼睛再学会飞行
夜空洒满了星星但即刻会落地
我飞行但你坠落之际
很靠近爱听见呼吸
对不起我却没捉紧你

你不知道我为什么离开你
我坚持不能说放任你哭泣
你的泪滴像倾盆大雨
碎落满地在心里清晰
你不知道我为什么狠下心
还悬在你看不见那高空里
多的事你不知道的事

蝴蝶擦几次眼睛再学会飞行
夜空洒满了星星但即刻会落地
我飞行但你坠落之际
很靠近爱听见呼吸
对不起我却没捉紧你

你不知道我为什么离开你
我坚持不能说放任你哭泣
你的泪滴像倾盆大雨
碎落满地在心里清晰
你不知道我为什么狠下心
还选择你看不见那高空里
多的事你不知道的事

oh wow oh~

我飞行但你坠落之际

ho~oh~~

你不知道我为什么离开你
我坚持不能说放任你哭泣
你的泪滴像倾盆大雨
碎落满地在心里清晰
你不知道我为什么狠下心
还悬在你看不见那高空里
多的事你不知道的事

oh~... ...

王力宏 - 需要人陪

2011-05-18T02:46:00.001+08:00

王力宏 - 需要人陪

打开窗户让孤单透气
这一间屋子如此密闭
欢呼声仍飘在空气里
像空无一人一样华丽
我渐渐失去知觉
就当做是种自我逃避
你飞到天的边缘
我也不猜落在何地
一个我需要梦想需要方向需要眼泪
更需要一个人来点亮天的黑
我已经无能为力无法抗拒无路可退
这无声的夜现在的我需要人陪
闭上眼睛就看不清
这双人床欠缺的温馨
谁能陪我直到天明
穿透这片迷蒙寂静
我已不猜落在何地

萧亚轩 - 错的人

2011-05-18T02:44:00.000+08:00

曲名：错的人
歌手：萧亚轩

萧亚轩 - 错的人

明知道爱情并不牢靠
但是我还是拼命往里跳
明知道再走可能是监牢
但是我还是相信只是煎熬
朋友都劝我不要不要
不要拿自己的幸福开玩笑
但是做人已经那么累
假惺惺的想要逃
在爱里连真心都不能给
这才真的真正的可笑
爱得太真太容易让自己牺牲
太容易让自己沉沦
太容易不顾一切满是伤痕
我太笨明知道你是错的人
明知道这不是缘分
但是我还奋不顾身
但我相信有点可能
可能在爱里面这样算笨
可能永远没有所谓永恒
但是我不愿放弃这里面一点点可能
宁愿笨也不想要悔恨

2011-05-15T21:58:00.001+08:00

trust,
faith,
care,
love..

robbed from me..

what did i do to deserve this?

grenade - bruno mars

2011-05-15T21:21:00.000+08:00

Easy come, easy go
That's just how you live oh
Take take take it all
But you never give
Should of known you was trouble
From the first kiss
Had your eyes wide open
Why were they open?

Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, you did
To give me all your love
Is all I ever asked
Cause what you don't understand
Is I'd catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on the blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I'd jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)

I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes I would die for you, baby
But you won't do the same
No, no, no, no

Black, black, black and blue
Beat me till I'm numb
Tell the devil I said hey when you get back to where you're from
mad woman, bad woman
That's just what you are
Yeah, you smile in my face then rip the breaks out my car

Gave you all I had
And you tossed it in the trash
You tossed it in the trash, yes you did
To give me all your love
Is all I ever asked
Cause what you don't understand
Is I'd catch a grenade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Throw my hand on the blade for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
I'd jump in front of a train for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)
You know I'd do anything for ya (yeah, yeah, yeah)

I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes I would die for you, baby
But you won't do the same

If my body was on fire
You'd watch me burn down in flames
You said you loved me, you're a liar
Cause you never ever, ever did, baby

But darling I'd still catch a grenade for ya
Throw my hand on the blade for ya
I'd jump in front of a train for ya
You know I'd do anything for ya

I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes I would die for ya baby
But you won't do the same
No, you won't do the same
You wouldn't do the same
You wouldn't do the same
Oh, you'd never do the same
No, no, no, no

2011-05-12T18:52:00.000+08:00

how to say 'i miss u' and 'i need you' w/o hurting anyone?

2011-05-12T12:09:00.000+08:00

these few days, i've talked alot alot.. but not to others..
specifically to myself..

i've been repeating 'i can do this' and 'we can do this tog' throughout the day..
when i was tired, i talked to myself, when i felt like giving up, i willed myself..
when i felt like breaking down, i plead to my body n mind to hang in there, to hold us tog..

i rem the cold ride home, there was no cars.. i was not listenin to songs..

i was alone..
alone on the road,
alone on the bike,
alone in the helmet..

i told my mind to take a break, and instruct my body to brg us home..
because i need to cont my revision..

i seems to be a passenger to my body and marvel at how my body reacted to every turn and stop, basic and safe movements to keep me and us in one piece..

i was quite impressed with myself..

the non stop pleading to myself not to give up,
the non stop repetitions to tell myself i can do it,

i finally survived 3 papers..

i did the best i can, the rest is up whoever in charge to decide my worth..

2011-05-05T10:28:00.001+08:00

honesty in relationship is over-rated..

倪安东 - 散场的拥抱

2011-05-05T10:24:00.001+08:00

倪安东 - 散场的拥抱
词：姚若龙曲：苏俊沅
从你的眼角慢慢地明了
我能做的很少
原来你藏着伤但不想和我聊
你选的电影像某种预告
不坦白的主角
最后流着眼泪坚持独自走掉
散场的拥抱我还在燃烧
但你心里的浪潮拒绝让我看到
你煎熬不肯定什么是最想要
爱才又像乐园又像监牢
散场的拥抱混乱的心跳
多宁愿只是争吵还能道歉和好
我知道你留着和他所有合照
明明面前是答案却撕掉不要
呵护地祈祷温柔地讨好
爱能让人渺小
苦笑冒充微笑浪漫得不肯逃
散场的拥抱我还在燃烧
但你心里的浪潮拒绝让我看到
你煎熬不肯定什么是最想要
爱才又像乐园又像监牢
散场的拥抱混乱的心跳
多宁愿只是争吵还能道歉和好
我知道我们和你们不能比较
但我的爱多强悍出乎你预料
散场的拥抱我还在燃烧
但你心里的浪潮拒绝让我看到
你煎熬不肯定什么是最想要
爱才又像乐园又像监牢
散场的拥抱混乱的心跳
多宁愿只是争吵还能道歉和好
我知道太美的回忆像副手铐
越是挣脱越缠绕我比你明了

reason for training

2011-03-25T22:07:00.002+08:00

I'm a beast,
I'm an animal,
I'm that monster
in the mirror,
The headliner,
finisher,
I'm the closer,
winner!
Best when
under pressure
one second's
left I show up

some words from jon 'bone' jones

2011-03-21T00:10:00.002+08:00

people who know what they want in life,
the universe has a way of clearing the path for them,
when u want sth bad enough,
it's gonna happen for you,
you can almost manifest your own destiny..

if you know what you are looking for,
you are almost sure you are gonna find it.

how can you find sth when you don't know what you are looking for..

being nervous is important,
nothing is wrong with having butterflies in your stomach,
as long as you can get them in a flying direction..

Jolin 蔡依林 - 妥協

2011-03-07T23:28:00.002+08:00

Jolin 蔡依林 - 妥協
花蝴蝶

你总爱编织谎言
我负责配合表演
所有改变只为了进入你的世界
这情节重复了一百遍
才发现是你的心太远

你划定楚河汉界
我不能轻易犯规
所有时间都是先给了你优先权
不自觉爱到不敢冒险
成了你的傀儡一年两年
才看见我有多狼狈
[01:26.06]
爱到妥协到头来还是误解
抱着你不让你飞
历史不断重演我好累
爱到妥协也无法将故事再重现
你也想退后一点我躲在我的世界

[02:04.73]
你只是害怕一个人睡
我不想再为你掉泪
我了解不会再仍在徘徊
开始自己的明天

爱到妥协到头来还是误解
抱着你不让你飞
历史不断重演我好累
爱到妥协也无法将故事再重现
你也想退后一点我躲在我的世界

2011-03-06T19:00:00.002+08:00

can't see the future,
can't always focus on the present and ignore present..

ignoring the present and yearning towards the future is a recipe for failure?

what's here now? is there anything here that would aid in the future?

2011-03-06T18:56:00.000+08:00

分久难合，
久合难分

2011-03-05T22:56:00.001+08:00

in a weird way, i hate weekends..

2011-03-04T01:16:00.000+08:00

goodness: helping me out big time with my cover letter!

2011-02-28T20:47:00.002+08:00

goodness: found out help link for me to refer to
goodness: helped me calm down and categorised my 'to-do' and 'need help', calmmin me down and lettin me know i hv control

2011-02-27T21:45:00.000+08:00

goodness: helping me with my resume and formatting.. great help

2011-02-26T08:34:00.001+08:00

i learnt hw to resuscitate a physically dead heart,

but how do you revive an emotionally dead heart?

2011-02-26T08:33:00.001+08:00

the difference between this time and every other times?

2011-02-25T18:27:00.001+08:00

this wk is simply terrible..

another reason y i love riding bike,
i can scream and scream and scream in my helemt
and no one can hear me..

2011-02-17T10:04:00.001+08:00

something inside died..

2011-02-15T23:36:00.002+08:00

i really cant be bothered anymore..

it's gonna drop to the last thing on my list..

so tired with the changes and the uncertainty..

come what may ba..

2011-02-14T20:24:00.000+08:00

what's the similarity between this vday and the last vday?

time is the essence

2011-02-14T19:37:00.002+08:00

on this Valentine's Day, i wonder what is the most precious thing you had ever given to your loved ones, friends and family?

Money? Love? Words? Intimacy? Gifts?

Then, it struck me that 'Time' is the most precious thing you can give to ur loved ones..

Spending time with them, the moments shared would forever remain in the memory..

The 'time' spent with them, would never ever be bought, rent, borrowed, because no humans has the power to turn back time..

treasure the time spent, appreciate it when ur loved ones take their time off and spent them on you, try your best to spend sm more time with them if you haven't done so..

happy vday everyone..

happy vday to all

2011-02-14T12:19:00.002+08:00

2011-02-06T13:17:00.000+08:00

goodness: saying hi to my mom!

2011-02-05T09:31:00.000+08:00

goondess: accompanying me to slp last night

2011-02-02T09:54:00.001+08:00

my fuse is burning out alr..

2011-02-01T22:35:00.001+08:00

2011-02-01T22:33:00.002+08:00

the clock is stopping

2011-02-01T22:30:00.001+08:00

2011-02-01T22:28:00.002+08:00

it comes and goes..

we give and we receive..

the days you are not there,
i've been thru them all..

perhaps, the cycle of life is turning..

2011-02-01T22:25:00.001+08:00

i think without any disrespect and all,
religion is more than enough for any kind of relationship
since the lord, the almighty can provide all for all..

2011-01-30T12:41:00.001+08:00

goodness: makin the effort to call and stay connected

2011-01-27T22:56:00.002+08:00

goodness: pork roll doesn't taste as good as with me.. any food taste great together..

2011-01-26T08:16:00.000+08:00

goodness: appreciating the effort and thanking me for posting the documents

2011-01-24T22:58:00.001+08:00

goodness: the unwavering desire to want to be with me

i'm glad, flattered and happy

swifters tee shirt design

2011-01-23T23:35:00.003+08:00

ntu bjj logo idea

2011-01-23T23:34:00.004+08:00

2011-01-23T23:34:00.001+08:00

feeling very perplexed... fuck...

2011-01-19T16:33:00.000+08:00

it's funny how the 28th month passed by so quietly and unknowningly..

2011-01-19T11:02:00.001+08:00

lying alone in the dark,
the tears won't stop..

i seek again,
is there anyone waiting to hold my hands?

2011-01-18T21:18:00.002+08:00

time difference => a reason to work harder or an excuse

2011-01-18T21:15:00.001+08:00

i turned around and saw no one there..

2011-01-17T21:44:00.002+08:00

我不想等了...

2011-01-17T21:43:00.000+08:00

每次跑步都是整理心情的时候

2011-01-17T20:09:00.000+08:00

count what you have, rather than what you dont have..

interesting..

failure

2011-01-15T22:30:00.001+08:00

tonight is a my failure as a son...

忙着别人的事
却忘了照顾自己的妈妈

2011-01-13T20:15:00.001+08:00

if i can lie thru my teeth, i can do anything..

keys to my memories

2011-01-13T20:05:00.002+08:00

different people remembers things in their life differently..

it's only recently that i came to my awareness that the emotions, things, stages in my life are all recorded in the songs i heard..

when my ipod plays on shuffle mode, the songs it played evoked different memories and emotions that i had experienced at each particular stage of my life..

so any time u see the songs being posted here, it represented the memories that are locked away, waiting to be revisited..

2010-12-25T21:54:00.002+08:00

before making someone your priority,
remember to chck with him/her whether he/she wants it in the first place..

if not, realising you are not as impt as you place them to be,
it'll only serve to kick your sorry A hole..

聖誕結 Lonely Christmas by 陳奕迅

2010-12-25T16:11:00.003+08:00

聖誕結
陳奕迅 Eason

我住的城市从不下雪
记忆却堆满冷的感觉
思念到忘记
霓虹扫过喧哗的街
把快乐赶得好远
落单的恋人最怕过节
只能独自庆祝尽量喝醉
我爱过的人没有一个留在身边
寂寞他陪我过夜
Merry Merry Christmas,Lonely Lonely Christmas
想祝福不知该给谁
爱被我们打了死结
Lonely Lonely Christmas,Merry Merry christmas
写了卡片能寄给谁
心碎的象街上的纸屑
落单的恋人最怕过节
只能独自庆祝尽量喝醉
我爱过的人没有一个留在身边
寂寞他陪我过夜
Merry Merry Christmas,Lonely Lonely Christmas
想祝福不知该给谁
爱被我们打了死结
Lonely Lonely Christmas,Merry Merry christmas
写了卡片能寄给谁
心碎的象街上的纸屑
电话不接不要被人发现我整夜都关在房间
缓缓的响声听来象哀悼的音乐
眼眶的泪温热冻结
望着电视里的无聊节目
躺在沙发上变成没知觉的植物
Merry Merry Christmas,Lonely Lonely Christmas
想祝福不知该给谁
爱被我们打了死结
Lonely Lonely Christmas,Merry Merry christmas
写了卡片能寄给谁
心碎的象街上的纸屑
Merry Merry Christmas,Lonely Lonely Christmas
想祝福不知该给谁
爱被我们打了死结
Lonely Lonely Christmas,Merry Merry christmas
写了卡片能寄给谁
心碎的象街上的纸屑
谁来陪我过这圣诞节

2010-12-20T21:35:00.000+08:00

thanks for being the barrier standing in my way..

thanks for being so consistent..

2010-12-20T19:08:00.000+08:00

if you are wasn't there at my worst,
you won't be there at my best..

2010-12-19T20:41:00.000+08:00

我也想要自私点。。。

可能我真的会。。

2010-12-19T20:39:00.000+08:00

有人在吗？
有人听得到我吗？
哈咯？

我很怕。。

有人在吗？

有人吗？

没人吧？

真的没有人。。。

2010-12-19T20:38:00.001+08:00

一个人

2010-12-19T20:30:00.001+08:00

回来跟没有回来已经没有什么差别，
回不回来，我也无话可说

2010-12-19T16:12:00.000+08:00

" I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times I am hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. "

borrowed from tatiana

2010-12-15T09:38:00.001+08:00

蔡康永：沒人喜欢喋喋不休的人。因为说话是两个人的事,她只顾自己說,不顾你想不想听,当然让你头痛。恋爱,也是两个人的事,你只顾自己一味付出,完全不管对方愿不愿接受,这样的付出,也只会使对方头痛。所以,请别再因为是自己在付出,就认定自己一定是比较委屈的那一方啊

borrowed from MK

2010-12-12T20:44:00.002+08:00

can i call on someone to support me?

2010-12-12T20:42:00.001+08:00

其实我是很needy..
我渴望你的陪伴..
但是你若不想的话，我问了，又有用吗？

2010-12-12T15:56:00.000+08:00

我也需要你的陪伴。。。

2010-12-11T19:39:00.002+08:00

needs some company..

2010-12-10T08:55:00.001+08:00

brain overheating,
body feelin hot..

head getting heavy..
heart in pain..

2010-12-07T20:05:00.002+08:00

establishing the time line can stamp out unnecessary thoughts or persuasion..

the effects remains unseen and unfelt..

but the domino will start to fall..

everything will takes its place in due time..

the motivation behind is clear.. the reasons, excuses are unsaid and underlying the the surface..

2010-12-06T13:22:00.001+08:00

last sat was one of the rare times i din slpt alone..
which was good..

had a good slp.. nice..

2010-11-29T23:11:00.001+08:00

it's good we are attempting to try.. trying to be better for each other..
it'l b a never ending process.. bearing in mind, we still love each other fr where we are..

2010-11-27T21:57:00.001+08:00

wild thoughts abt aids

2010-11-27T21:56:00.002+08:00

what is/are important in a relationship?

2010-11-26T09:42:00.000+08:00

'how realistically possible is it?'

2010-11-19T21:40:00.003+08:00

progression of human is from remembering the hate, the pain, the negatives and holding them dear

counting blessings and drowning in the fleeting pleasant illusion would only serve as temporary contentment and stangation in the end

2010-11-19T21:39:00.001+08:00

concern is shown only when one has nothing better to do

2010-11-19T14:55:00.000+08:00

好久不见你还好吗
你的小狗长大了吗
我的围巾还围着吗
我的相片都丢了吧

2010-11-18T01:21:00.002+08:00

destructive vicious cycle

2010-11-14T15:53:00.000+08:00

明白了。。。

习惯就好。。

不会再那么傻了。。

2010-11-14T10:42:00.000+08:00

晚上有寂寞陪我睡觉
谢谢你

2010-11-12T22:24:00.001+08:00

我需要有人来照顾和安慰，鼓励和支持。。。

2010-11-12T22:19:00.001+08:00

我的感受有人要了解和知道？

会重要吗？

2010-11-10T21:20:00.000+08:00

我也会感到寂寞

晚上，有时候需要你来陪

但是。。。

2010-11-10T21:15:00.002+08:00

wonderful sch dream i had today..

woke up wif a smile, hoping it'l be realised..

but somewhere deep inside...

2010-11-07T10:45:00.001+08:00

is it a sign of weakness for a man to let his woman know his problems?

2010-11-04T00:22:00.002+08:00

for many times i've alr stated, honestly believe and still does that she is not fat..

i merely wanted to know what's the weight and it is as difficult as milking blood from stone..

i wonder why.. i'm almost to the stage of begging (which i think totally no pt)

if it's really so hard to tell me (your bf), then we'll leave it at that.. i dont wana know (thanks)

same old shit

2010-11-03T23:56:00.002+08:00

it's actually very simple..

a simple msg..

a sense of duty and responsibility towards each other in a r/s..

an eqn: 1 + 1 will always be 2

if you love each other, we'l b giving our 1 and it'l add up to two..

however, things are not so simple..

i'm really tired of repeating, nagging..

if we are to be together for the rest of our lives, i can't be forever sayin and repeating the same thing over and over again.. unless you have other plans w/o me in the future, kindly advise early..

i've stated very clearly and often what i need, otherwise, i'l b upset..

if you really give a crap abt me being upset, would you still do what you did?

obviously, for all the times i've repeated.. it din went inside the head..

sth, somewhere muz b wrong.. mayb if it went right, she wouldn't be called who she is.. i wonder..

did saying nicely work? nope.. did screaming and shouting work? nope..

i'm alr at my wits' end..
i decided to give up till she can figure what it is all abt..

i think there isn't any pt to repeat.. if she aint sick of it, i'm sick of myself..

2010-11-01T12:05:00.000+08:00

有没有别人跟我一样很想被安慰

2010-10-31T20:39:00.002+08:00

i don't need any pardon for thinking negatively..

as today rolls on, i thought about the past things i've said..

the things i asked countless times.. undone.. so what does it shows?

i looked at my palm, it's healing alg nicely.. i'm not sure whether it's recovery concerns anyone? maybe it shdn't be a bother to anyone else except me..

i looked at the medal, does it really mean anything to her? luckily i've got a bunch of crazy ppl ard me who is interested in it..

i wonder over and over again what's the love about? it's just words? what would put meaning into the word? apparently, it's becoming a word to me.. as i reflect, i wonder whether is this the love she has to afford? is the concern she has?

i wonder..

2010-10-31T19:35:00.000+08:00

talk is cheap..

dirt cheap..

fuckin cheap..

worthless cheap..

2010-10-30T22:01:00.001+08:00

fucking pisses the shit outta when i'm tryin to studyin..

fucking unhealthy..

2010-10-10T19:10:00.001+08:00

i am one of her adversities..

should i make myself scarce???

if that would allow her to be alil bit happier....

2010-10-09T22:31:00.000+08:00

why is it whatever i say is always wrong...

2010-10-09T22:15:00.001+08:00

humans are selfish creatures

2010-10-08T20:39:00.001+08:00

体谅我，会很难吗？

2010-10-08T10:10:00.001+08:00

stressed.. fucking stressed..

2010-09-30T18:29:00.002+08:00

how do you determine the priority/importance of your loved ones?

when you have things to do? when you need them? when they are in trouble?

how do you determine the closeness of your loved ones?

when you have a common interest? when you are physically close? sex? hugs? kiss?

are there any guidelines or is it just a big grey area??

2010-09-28T21:35:00.001+08:00

the dreaded reminders keeps haunting me till this day..

i cannot get the awful images out of my head...

i cannot..

i really cannot..

2010-09-26T19:21:00.002+08:00

mayb on my bday, i just wish for no arguments and time to spend with each other..
but it seems like we have our endless things to do..

2010-09-26T12:04:00.001+08:00

happy birthday wasn't exactly happy birthday